How Do You Handle Family and Friends That Judge You?

Be the first to laugh at yourself. Be the first to make the joke on you. Then your detractors won’t want to do this. You’ve taken away their desire to make you look bad, or wrong or silly. There’s no fun for them if you agree with them! If you say it first, then they would have to agree with you! And they probably don’t want to agree with you on anything! If they manage to do this first, then you agree and escalate. Make it so big it is funny! Exaggeration is a form of humor – and will give you the opportunity to laugh at yourself with them!

Perhaps they call you irrational. Sometimes family and friends are irrational. You can laugh and say, “Me! What about you?” When they try to convince you that they are the “sane” one, laugh again, and say, everyone is irrational some of the time. Don’t try to defend yourself. Instead, power up YOU by saying there is tons of research on why people don’t think for themselves and act irrationally! There is a need for many people who have yet to claim their power, to validate outside of themselves. Any detractor is looking for a way to validate their own beliefs. Maybe you share this need, looking for validation outside of you.

Your detractors may be the ones who are looking for validation. They might have heard some of the things you have spoken of. They are curious but they are not ready to be convinced. They might want you to be right and are afraid that you are right. Wait until they bring these things up a second time, and then discuss more openly. The first time someone asks about alternative matters, they are curious, and they have opened their mind. The second time they ask, they have opened their heart (non-judgmental) and will be ABLE to receive your information. Be gentle, be slow, be kind and be funny.

They want to believe in something, but they want an outside authority to tell them what to believe. They KNOW you so you are not an outside authority! However, you can change that.
When you VALIDATE them, you are giving them power to choose. How will you do this?

Decide that they have a right to their belief system. When they challenge you and your belief system, you can say, “I champion your right to hold that belief as long as it pleases you.” This gives them your vote of confidence and gives them room to grow and change. It also says to them, when (not if) you change your mind, I’ll have your back then too!

If necessary, you can add, “I hope you’ll do the same for me.” Most times, that is not necessary. When someone expects you to do something more, you can say, I understand why you think that, or say that, or want that … BUT I have decided this. Validate the other person first – then you have made a safe space for them to disagree with you.

Most people want agreeableness, and do not understand that agreeableness could mean they have stepped out of their power. Many people do not think for themselves because they have not been taught to think critically. All the sciences teach critical thinking – but the arts have not. So sometimes your experience of others not seeing what you see, is because they have never been taught to think in a way that allows them to come to their own conclusions. They rely on others, the news, the pundits and such to provide them with their information. When the Comedy Central show, The Daily Show, was hosted by Jon Stewart, a survey was done that showed 80% of young people ages 25-35 got their “news” from alternative sources such as the Comedy Central channel, and not mainstream news!

Transitioning into 5D

In 5D, how do you ask for a “win” against your adversary? You pray for their recovery. You pray that if you win, they recover somehow. If you lose you recover nicely. You “claim” in manifestation work, “I’m amazed that it all worked out. I’m so grateful the drama had a happy ending!” You don’t need to know what that “happy ending” is. You simply see that it all resolved with grace and ease. You can also say to the Universe, I’m ready for this to be over. I’m ready for the drama to have a happy ending. I’m so grateful that it all worked out!